Text messaging has become some what of a phenomenon. I mean really, it causes car accidents, romance, heartbreak, mass hysteria, and high phone bills… among other things. I like to have dinner parties, and I tend to send out what some people refer to as “mass texts” to let the 10-20 guest i would like to invite know the who what where. Once you receive a mass text, you know you’ve been hit. Today I decided to switch things up a bit. There was no party. Nothing happened. I honestly came up with the simplest yet ever-so-slightly random question I could come up with, and I texted it to every person in my phone that I thought might respond with an interesting answer.


If you could be any animal, what would you be?


I thought for sure the replies would be confused and uninterested. Oh, on the contrary, my dears. These people laid it down, as if admitting their deepest animal secret would allow them to become one. I was a little freaked out once people started responding because their answers were very fitting. Each person chose an animal (or sea creature, what have you) that was oddly similar to them or reflected their behavior or personality eerily well. It was interesting to me that the people who said 2 animals picked two very different animals. Some people seemed to know the answer to this question immediately, as if they had thought about this for a very long time. They are as follows, AND I QUOTE:


– a lion OR a seahorse


– Probably a silver back gorilla.. id get all the babes and no one would fuck with me =]

– At the moment. A bunny so I can be promiscuous and have that warm fur and burrow into a hole.

– Thats easy. a t-rex with wings and a flying v guitar. [a few minutes later] I think I want to change my answer to a penguin with a jet pack or a party animal.

– Something that could fly and has talons like a hawk. or like a majestic wolf.

– Mt fuji, the cat.

– a sweet bird

– I’ve always liked monkeys . . . I was a gorilla in 4th grade.

– how about a bear?

– the donkey that Mary rode upon to Bethlehem

– hm… I’ve never been able to pick just one. Perhaps a flying squirrel. They get to jump from tree to tree and have a big bushy tail.

– A whale I think. [after hearing what animal I would like to be] Of course! I would build you a fox house on my back and take you to alaska with me.

Potbelly pig!!!!!!

– A cat… as weird as it sounds I really like to be petted!

– a bird of paradise

– giant wolf

– an armadillo…

– a magic rhino

– God

– Cat. [few minutes later] or monkey.

– a panda duhhh

– a giraffe

– a zombie dog so i could fuck peoples faces up

polycorn [as opposed to a UNIcorn]

– A fucking LION

– I would be an m-effin jungle cat

– I’ve been told i’d be a wild horse. But i’d liked to be a tiger or and eagle.

– probably a bird. That would be sweet to fly all around. Maybe a dope animal like a jaguar. i dunno i dunno


And I would be none other than a red fox. I would get to build my own home, Id have a pretty solid crew and I’d be an excellent planner. Of course.

**pssst… be sure to click the links. theres some gems up there!

Hope everyone is having a great monday.